I went over it and made some changes to the story with better word choice. I also put more description sentences to it.I also made some changes where the sentences didn't make since to my reader.There were also more sentences to be changed.
Olivia, Tori and I woke up one morning and wanted to go water skiing. We ran down stairs and asked my mom she said maybe later because the water is to cold right now. We ate breakfast fast so we could get dressed and ready to go skiing when the sun comes up. Finally when the sun came up we went up stairs and my dad called us. We wondered why he called us were we in trouble, did we do something wrong? What did he want us for? Whenwe saw him he was ready to go waterskiing and the water was warmer. So we rushed back up stairs to put our shoes on. Then we got our bags with our note books,pencils, and snacks.
When we got in the boat we had to put on our life jackets. He started the boat and we
almost fell out of the boat and then a whale swam up to the surface of the sea. It blew air out it’s air hole and it looked like a v or an arrow. It was very weird and then the clouds started to turn gray and then my friend said that the weather man told them there was going to be a storm. So we paddled very quickly to the shore and when we got there and it was poring down cats and dogs. So we ran back to the house and had to stay in and be bored the rest of the day.