The best picnic ever!

                    Deanna, Ansley, and I met at my house and we talked about what we should do for the day. They gave me some ideas. Deanna suggested that we go to the park. I do not really think that we should. I told everybody that it is a very beautiful day. I say we go on a picnic on a nice day like this one. They said that is a wonderful idea. So what should we take on the picnic?

 

         I told them that we should make some sandwiches. I have some mayo, turkey, cheese, ham, and bread. If you want I have some chips that we can take. Ansley said what kind do you have? I replied I do not know, let’s go look. So we went to look in my cabinets. I saw some lays, barbeque, and I also had a thing of Pringles. Deanna said that we take lays, and Ansley said we take Pringles. So I suggested we take both. They replied that will do. I told Deanna to get out the sandwiches, to make them. She washed her hands. Then she asked us what we wanted on our sandwiches. I told her that I wanted turkey, cheese, and mayo. Then Ansley said ham and mayo. Deanna wanted turkey, cheese, and mayo. After she was done making them she put plastic rap on them and put everything away. Then she put the sandwiches in the cooler and into the car. We packed up so we could leave. We got in the car. I drove to this place it had a lot of leafs everywhere with berries on it. Ansley suggested we have them for like a little desert. I said that was a great idea.

 

             We got the cooler out of the car and sat down on my blanket. Deanna took out the sandwiches and handed them to us. Took the plastic rap of the sandwiches and then we ate them. We all said thank you to each other for coming and Deanna making the sandwiches. We also told her that they were totally delicious. Then we ate some berries they were also very good to. I said that it was the best thing I have ever done with my best friends.

 

 

 

Photo Courtesy of Chris

 

Comments

[Alecia]

This is an excellent piece of writing. I am very impressed with you skills. Sounds like you had a great time.

[Ms. Scarbary]

Lindsey-

That definitely sounds like the best picnic ever! When I was in fifth grade, my cousin and I used to pick lots of blackberries in the summer. I'm glad to know that fifth graders still like to pick and eat blackberries.
Your story is very well written. I think it's wonderful that friends can share jobs, like making sandwiches, and plan a fun trip on a beautiful day.
Keep Writing!

[Angela]

Lindsey,
I enjoyed your story very much. I think you are a talented writer! From your story it also seems that you are a good problem solver with a lot of excellent ideas. Do you often help your friends to come to an agreement in real life?

[Cynthia]

Lindsey,
You have included some specific details in your story and used dialogue, too. What else did the friends do on their picnic? Do you have any ideas from games or adventures that you have had while at a park or on a picnic? It seems like something funny or annoying always happens to me--once, a squirrel ate our bread when we went to look at a stream!
I hope to read more of your stories.

Cynthia

[Cynthia]

Lindsey,
You have included some specific details in your story and used dialogue, too. What else did the friends do on their picnic? Do you have any ideas from games or adventures that you have had while at a park or on a picnic? It seems like something funny or annoying always happens to me--once, a squirrel ate our bread when we went to look at a stream!
I hope to read more of your stories.

Cynthia

[Delbert]

Lindsey
This is very well written. Right now, I'm wishing I had you as one of my eighth grade students with the writing test approaching. I really liked the fact that you kept everything organized and made it easy to follow from the beginning to the end. Even at the eighth grade level, many students still fail to guide their readers from a clear start to a clear finish.

[lindsey]

Alecia,
I forgot to tell you that it did not happen in real life it is a made up story that we had to do. I am glad that you liked it and thought it was real. It does sound like it could happen in real lfe, doesn't it. If I did do it in real life it would be so cool!

[lindsey]

Ms. Scarbary,
Thank you! Alot of people tell me that I am a very well writer and a good or great writer and I really appriciate that. I do like to pick berries but I do not like black berries. It is just because I have never tried them. I love strawberries with whip cream and by itself. They are so delicous. It would be a great picnic if it was for real. It was also a very beautiful day like you said and I said in the paragraph. I can say that sandwiches are good. I eat them all the time.

[lindsey]

Angela,
I actually do help solve problems in real life. Like when my friends at school are always in a fight I try to do the best I can and solve it or. It is also a very hard thing to stop the problem. Say you try to stop a problem and be the big person, the other girl that is in the fus says stay out of it, it is non of your buisness, it is like they are trying to be all big tough about what they say. That is not cool, or nice. Have you ever stopped a argument?

[lindsey]

Cynthia,
You stand up to those squirrels if you do not want them to eat your bread. Well I do not know if I mentioned it but we did do a lot of looking around and talking to each other. Not in real life. I wished it was in real life and I do not wish it was in real life. Would you like to go on a picnic with your friends some day?

[whitney]

wow me and mom love this maby you should become a writer!! i think that your work is beautiful love mom and whitney

[chris]

What are "lays"? You mention them in the same sentence as Pringles, and I know what they are!
In Scotland, we call blackberries "brambles" and I usually stew them with a great deal of sugar before I eat them as they're pretty sour. I love your picnic, though!